Archive for the ‘Fails’ Category

Shameful Secret


I have a secret, and I think it’s about time I admitted it.

Today is the 6th December and as it stands, only Twink will be getting any Christmas presents this year.

Okay, so actually that is a slight exaggeration…Squish has 5 books & a teddy bear with buttons to make it talk coming her way. Everyone else? Nothing. Husband? Nada. Best friend? Not a thing. All our close friends’ children who we know will be giving our children presents? Nope. Our parents? Er…you can probably guess the answer.

I am just in complete denial. I don’t even know how many shopping days till Christmas. Yes, I could work it out, but I’m not going to. I am sticking my fingers in my ears and LA LA LA I CAN”T HEAR YOU!!

I had big plans. I still do actually. I was going to make 95% of the presents. I even know exactly what I want to make for everyone…well, except my husband. Not a clue about him. But everyone else has a thoughtful gift just waiting to be made for them. I even have a tonne of fabric & yarn to make them with. Beans for bean bags. Stuffing for teddies. And yet every evening finds me collapsed on the sofa trying not to fall asleep.

Perhaps, you might think, I have a lot of works in progress, just waiting for the finishing touches. Um…well…I have two. One is a hat…well, it’s 10 rows of double crochet…so nearly a hat. The other is a cushion I am covering with a much loved t-shirt…I have the cushion & I have the t-shirt. Stitches so far? Zero.

What’s the problem? Well, apart from extreme exhaustion caused by (among other things) sick, non-sleeping children & a boiler that temporarily went kaput right when the cold snap started, I’ve been waiting for my room to be finished. My garage has been converted into a room for me. A library, an office, a spare room, and most importantly a sewing room. It’s more or less finished. There are shelves where I have lovingly arranged my fabric stash, and yet more shelves where I have plonked as many of my books as will fit. The desk is in there, as is my sewing machine. But there are also dismembered shelves sitting in the middle of the room, and boxes littering the floor. I’ve been waiting for it to be ready before I start, and I am running out of time.

My gorgeous, messy stash of stuff

So how long should I wait until I admit defeat and do a mad rush to the shops for some 3 for the price of 2 generic dull presents? Or should I hold out a bit longer and order everything off Amazon at the last minute? Or perhaps you can help by giving me a quick slap, chucking a bucket of cold water over me & telling me to get on with it.

…while I wait for your answer…I’m going to sleep….yes, my crocheted hat-to-be is sitting next to me…a hat specifically requested by a little girl who calls me Auntie…and yet I still can’t be bothered. Where the hell did I leave my motivation??



So, I’ve been a little bit absent…we’ve had a couple of technical issues here at Cheeky Mummy headquarters, which have combined with Hubby being SOOOOOO unbelievably busy with work (so he can’t fix my little blog) & meant I’ve just not bothered. And it’s been too hot anyway (have I ever mentioned that the bottom of my Macbook is seriously thermonuclear after about 5 minutes of use? No? Well it is. And I have the burn marks to prove it! A burning hot laptop is not something I want to get close to when the whole world is burning hot!

I have been taking daily photos of Squishy, I promise, but they are actually the main reason I’ve not been blogging. I can’t seem to upload any pictures at all…and a blog without pictures is just a little dull.

Um…what else have I done…


…oh yeah! I finished that little matinee jacket as pictured at the bottom of this post (just have to adjust the buttons as I don’t like where I put them, and buy some ribbon to go round the middle). It nearly killed me as I had to rip out the skirt bit a grand total of 3 times as I just kept losing stitches! Careless, I know…

I also bought yet more yarn, for yet more projects that I need to find time for, and a gorgeous tie dye/batik style remnant that I want to make into a dress for Squish and a shirt for Twink (if there’s enough fabric…may have to be a panelled shirt).

I’ve been out on TWO girlie nights! Well…just meals, but still…they involved nice (ish) clothes, heels, make up & even some nail varnish at the second one. Get me & my exciting life!!

Twink has decided that bedtime ought to be 9pm.¬†I’m a bit tired as this means I’m staying up until about 1am in a desperate attempt for some time away from babies.

Well, just thought I’d let you all know that I’m still alive (to be fair, if you follow me on twitter, you’ll have spotted that already!), and I will be back shortly, as soon as whatever is going wrong with photo uploading is fixed (bet it takes him 5 seconds once he actually has time to look at it!). Hope there’s still someone out there reading :D

PS. I have just realised I can still upload photos to WordPress from my iPhone…so why haven’t I done that? I really am just lazy, I guess…will try harder this week.

Ups & Downs


This week has been a mixed sort of week. The highs came first, followed by the crash (almost literally), and then thankfully some more highs. So I’m sorry for disappearing so soon after starting this blog, but my head has been in a strange and busy place for most of the week…

The early part of the week was spent visiting friends, both old and new. A few of my friends had babies around the same time I had Squishy, so we visited them and marvelled at how tiny Squishy is even compared to babies younger than her. Not that there’s anything wrong with her – she’s absolutely perfect – she’s just petite. At 11 weeks she is just growing out of her newborn clothes, which is a huge difference from Twink who was a chunk from birth and was moving into 3-6 month clothes by this age!

Next Squishy and I went on an adventure to London to meet up with some new friends (well, I’d met some of them before, but only once or twice). There were loads of us, with hoards of children, and we all had a massive picnic in Coram’s fields. Squishy slept in her sling almost the whole time, just waking up once for a quick feed and then deciding she wanted to watch the world go by on the train going home. When we got home, Hubby decided to take us to our favourite pub for dinner and all in all life was good.

Then Friday happened.

It started so well…breakfast in Starbucks (we don’t eat out all the time…it’s just we hadn’t had time to buy any actual food, so it was a choice between going out for breakfast or eating pasta…) with Hubby who then popped into the office briefly before coming home to pick us up for Twink’s Water Babies lesson. It’s a real treat to see so much of him on a weekday, so we were having a lovely, happy time.

We were about a minute away from the swimming pool when a warning light came on in the car…then the steering went reeeaaaalllly heavy. Trying to move a three tonne car with no power steering and the engine working against you is not easy. So we pulled over. Turns out important parts in our car had snapped. For no reason whatsoever. Just one of those ‘it’s not fair’ type things. Grrrr. We managed to limp to the swimming lesson, but had to rush (slowly…there are a lot of roundabouts where I live and even Hubby found turning the car a challenge!) to the garage in the hopes our car could be fixed.

This car is Hubby’s baby (and he’s worked really hard to get a nice car), so he was more than a little stressed by the whole thing. Especially as we were just gearing up to buy it new brake pads and tyres. Even more annoyingly, the garage is tiny and in the middle of an industrial estate, so we had to stick Twink in the pushchair, Squishy in the sling and walk for miles to keep them happy and entertained, while we tried not to worry about how big a dent it would make in our bank balance.

In the end it wasn’t that big a dent…but then we had the 3 hour long bedtime from hell, just when we needed some wind down time! Twink just doesn’t seem to want to go to sleep, although he sleeps fine once he’s asleep.

In the grand scheme of things it wasn’t that bad. Our car broke down. It got fixed. There are bigger problems to have. Ironically I was also supposed to be buying a car this weekend (we currently share), so we spent Saturday looking for one, but all the cars we can afford seem to be damaged…so we have to wait until we have more money…and I have to share a car for a few more months.

We made up for the stress today by going for a picnic at the safari park again, where Twink again slept through the animal drive through bit, but had huge fun in the soft play area, and was even persuaded to eat an ice cream this time!

Squishy’s Arrival & a bit of (unrelated) Stupidity


I had every intention of just telling the story of Squishy’s arrival, but I feel I need to own up to being monumentally stupid at times…if anyone asks, I’m blaming baby brain, okay?!

Last night I sent a text message to a friend, asking when she wanted to meet up. This morning she replied saying we’d already made plans for tomorrow afternoon. Doh! That’s not it though…that’s just a little added daftness I’m throwing in for free.

Fast forward to 2pm this afternoon and I’m waiting for her to arrive.

2.30pm – I’m getting annoyed.

3pm – I’m really upset now. I decide to send her a text asking where the hell she is. But before I send the message I read the old message…& notice the crucial word; ‘tomorrow’.

3.05pm – I’m trying to sink into the sofa in shame. How I managed to read it & assume she meant today, I don’t know, but I felt ridiculously stupid.

So this evening I decided to bake a cake to cheer myself up.


Yep, that’s a crater in the middle of my cake! I am usually quite good at baking, honestly, but apparently not today! The obvious next step was to hack it to bits & cover it in icing.

It’s a teddy bear…an alien teddy bear…a lilac alien teddy bear!

Meh, whatever it is it tasted pretty good & led to the line; ‘you don’t need to cut it, you can just pull the ears off’, which made me laugh! The end result of the cake was that I’m cheered up, so it did its job!

I haven’t left much time to write about Squishy’s arrival into the world, so I’ll keep it short and to the point (like the birth actually!):

  • One hour 50 minutes from start to baby.
  • One hour 20 minutes from my waters breaking.
  • About 25 minutes in established labour.
  • She surprised us all by being breech.
  • She arrived as the midwife walked through the front door – so technically ‘born before arrival’.
  • My bestest friend ever caught her (having arrived less than 5 minutes earlier) on her own daughter’s birthday, & is named on my notes as delivering her.
  • My best friend told us we’d had a boy (but realised her mistake a couple of minutes later!).
  • The birth pool went back unused as we didn’t have time to fill it.
  • The third stage took an annoying hour & a half – much harder work than just having the baby!.

And today is her 2 month birthday!

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